Marriage and concerns …
Recall that Sue Monk Kidd, in her book ‘The Mermaid Chair’, described the uncoupling of the marriage of the main character and her subsequent attempts at rehabilitating the relationship.
In an earlier piece of writing, Kidd speaks of the many separate aspects of a woman’s journey of life. The book is ‘The Dance of the Dissident Daughter’.
Monk says that ‘…A marriage or any relationship between partners is meant to be created and re-created. It is an edifice a couple builds until the day the edifice can no longer hold them and they must bring it down and start again from scratch. And without any of the old assumptions. It’s exactly like Carolyn Heilbrun (Writing a Woman’s Life , 1988) says, all good marriages are remarriages…’ P. 101.
This is much like the cogent analyis in DIane Vaughn's study of marriage and divorce in her book -'Uncoupling'.
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It is understandable, there are powerful forces in our society which compel us to stay in bad relationships because that is what "good wives" do....pressures to be a "nice" woman. Some hold on to dysfunctional relationships with a firm hold. It was once described to me as "hanging on with every fiber of one's being". New research on girl's developement show that from an early age there is pressure to be popular, smart and nice. It logically follows that "Divorce" is negative and imperfect and messy. In order to attain society's predetermined role for them, individuals can sometimes subordinate their own desires.
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